See, this is why I put a password on here. As of this writing Sean is the only one who can read these, and he’s saying I took Too Much Acid. He’s probably right, but imagine if my parents had read all that—or Will—or somebody from the school—?
So why did I feel compeld to take 6 damn hits only 72 hours after the last dose? I dunno. I mean this weekend was pretty alright, I got a lot of sleep & relaxation, Sean’s been staying at Rachel’s so I’ve had the dorm to myself. Ceejay left his bowl in my car (“Spidey the Bowl” because it’s red & blue like Spiderman) so Sunday night I scraped that fucker & drove around, the quintessential “asshole with a hash pipe” cruising Centennial Park. Monday was boring/depressing. Scholarship work suckt, Alford was piping Rush Limbaugh thru the PA system while we organized cables. Then I went to band practice all sad because Sean & Ceejay both got pussy this weekend. What a silly reason to get upset. Jeremiah noticed my mood & askt what was on my mind—I told him I’m dreading the schoolweek. Once those guys left he gave me a painkiller & we played music for a little while longer.
OK, there it is: the painkiller. I let it fool me into feeling good, like I was back in a healthy mental place. When really I was still brooding over my virginity—and then over-indulging in another chemical I’ve recently had access to (that nobody else at school really does) in an effort to compensate? Goddamn.
Lesson learned: You can’t force it. I didn’t have a “bad trip” per se, just a weak & pointless one. I was up all night tho which left me twackt out for the Libby Larsen masterclass, but that was still quite enjoyable. Not sure how much of it I really heard.
Slept a quick & troubled sleep in the afternoon, then awoke to murky skies—the storms I’d been excited for the night before were arriving on their own schedule: lesson reinforced. Then tornadoes came; we watched the action unfold from the 3rd floor of the Waites Complex. Lightning struck close by & a lot of people decided to move to ground level. Students & professors & even Ms Larsen were sitting down along the walls of the main floor’s hallway. Most of it ended up going south of us. (Everyone’s always caught off-guard by the mini-season of tornadoes we have in late fall in the South.) Eventually I got a ride with Sean & Levi back to our side of campus. They still had everybody gatherd on the 1st floor of Killebrew, so we stashed our guitars in Blake’s room & walkt to the SLC to eat.
Today was kinda routine, except I did see the Nashville Symphony perform this morning in the concert hall. Then this evening when I went up to Echo Hollow to practice, no one was there. Walkt across the street & knockt on the McClellans’ door, Mrs M told me Jeremiah had taken his mom to the hospital because she had chest pain. She said Ceejay was in Gallatin, so I drove over to Chris & Jon’s but didn’t find anyone there either. Headed back the other way, down Vietnam Veterans to Skyline to see if Jere & Ms Riddle were still there but they had just left. So I came home, to the dorm.